Men and Sexual Subjectivity

C/O Allison Ildefonso

C/O Allison Ildefonso

Union - Android Jones

Union - Android Jones

Men & Sexual Subjectivity 

Disclosure: This is an echo of so many thoughts and words before me. I am here to say that I appreciate and hear each and every one of you. This needs to be said because it is not said enough. My opinion is from a heterosexual perspective. I thank the men that teach, participate in, and cultivate conscious mindful connections. For information & inspiration on the sacred masculine,  I recommend following:  @sacredsons @spiritualheart @prestonsmiles @thehealingmatt @adam.roa @adam__jackson 




Here we go:👇🏻




There are many differences between the conscious sacred masculine man and the conditioned man that society has cultivated. Some of the most prominent differences are how they approach, perceive, interact with, and show affection to women.




Everyday we see conditioned men falling victim to societies’ normalities. In today’s society, it is normal and accepted to only see women as sexual objects. Most women are judged on outer appearance alone as a reason for partnership. 




I was driving down the street and, just today, noticed how many half naked women are on billboards all over the city. It’s everywhere, on social media, on every ad, in pop culture, and in social conversation saying, “damn that girl is fine.” 




What is wrong with harmless comments and pictures? The fact that they are not harmless. The multitude of attention to sexualizing females diminishes all other personal characteristics. Yes, that female may be beautiful. There is a difference between appreciating beauty and sexualizing a person.  While being beautiful does feel good and has its advantages (with men), being beautiful does not impact the world in any way. Seeing only outward appearance diminishes intelligence, sense of humor, attitude, personal skills, talents, spiritual awareness, and emotions.




Approaching a woman - Instead of a conditioned A response, Try B? 




A. She is pretty, I want to talk to her. 

B. I like her sense of style, I wonder what makes her like that. Then finding out! 




A. Look at her, wow. 

B. She has a stunning smile, I want to know why she is so happy. 




A. She is sexy.

B. What are your physical health practices and what makes them important to you? 




A. I want to fuck her. 

B. I want to know more about her. 







The sacred masculine. What does this mean in relation to women sexualization? It means that you see a human soul rather than outward appearance only. It’s simple. You are a soul relating to another soul. 

The problem is not realizing that sexual energy is a powerful force that has to be controlled and channeled in conscious, consensual, mindful action with intention. It is a superpower that we have to learn how to control. 




There is a time and place for sexual energy. It has to be treated as sacred because it is so powerfully charged. When you give that away for free to everyone, it becomes less valuable to your partner.




When a partner gives sexual energy away to another, that action cultivates feelings of inadequacy. Making the other partner question what they are doing wrong. I realize that this all sounds like deep seeded insecurity. Which it is. I have been around men who only see women as walking sex dolls and that being accepted. All of the trauma in my life is from men who did not know how to channel or harness their sexual power. 




Once we start seeing humans as idiosyncratic beings with appreciation and curiosity, we will develop a greater understanding for who that person really is and learn about ourselves through that unique relationship. We further know clearer if this human is a fit for us or not. We develop a greater knowledge base on deeper human interaction. We will learn more about ourselves and our behavioral patterns through others.




It is primitive and immature to base opinions on outward appearance alone. This topic bleeds into more than sexual attraction. It touches on the perceived “differences” that are really just idiosyncrasies. What if we lived in a society where we all saw each other as complex beings?




I am just asking, for myself, for men to honor their power. Honor their worth. Honor their feelings. I encourage men to get serious about what they want and not settle for less. Show up authentically. Know whether you are choosing sexuality vs. intimacy.  Be open with communication from the beginning. Realize every single day you do not have to react from your environment, but create in response to environment.




Humans are not here merely to procreate. Our purpose here is morphing into a conscious awakening. It is every person’s duty to be the best person that they can be on a daily basis. Acting with gratitude for the mistakes that have taught hard lessons allowing awareness to consciously grow, merge, love, appreciate, and create. It is of the utmost importance to act with intention and be conscious of how actions affect others. 

BB3B3A9C-DBE2-47FF-BDC4-A74293CD7A6A.png

 










Athena Sweeten